Craft Genius

INNER MONOLOGUE:
"What a beautiful day. The birds are singing and I detect the scent of fresh lilacs in the breeze. Nothing can be more perfect than this day, except perhaps my new butterfly shirt. I stitched it myself. Yep, mm-hmm. Just me, some needles, some thread, and this shirt! I'm a craft genius. This was an even more successful project than that macramé owl I made for Cousin Nancy. She didn't appreciate it. Now she'll be sorry she didn't get a butterfly shirt. MY butterfly shirt. My very special one. Instead, she'll have to deal with that "illness." Syrup of ipecac makes people appreciate handmade crafts. That, and pure, green envy."