Hoodwinked

"I come, bearing gifts from my master. He bequeaths to you this scrumptious apple, fresh from the tree. I have come over hill and dale to present you with this fine morsel; over river and stream. We are a peace-loving people, loyal and true. We care not for the quiver and bow, we care only for tilling the soil and raping the land.

...wait, that came out wrong. I meant REAPING the land. Oh, that one's gonna land on the blooper reel for sure! Are my cheeks red? Because I am on FIRE!"